The Hot & Unbothered Edit

On this week’s episode, I was paralysed with an anxiety attack for 16 hours. Pros? I lost 2kg because I couldn’t make myself eat, and my body was under so much stress, probably the same equivalent of me running a marathon (can I actually count it as one?) Do not try it at home, nor tell my nutritionist. Cons? I was paralysed and staring at the white wall in complete silence. Not something I would recommend. Truth be told, in my early 20s, I was suffering from severe panic att

Enough of negative self-talk. Someone clocked me yesterday. Naturally, I went into over-explaining myself that it wasn’t my intention and all that, but it didn’t really matter, because this is what the person saw. And there was no coming back. Good thing I don't believe in regrets . Very ironic, gathering the facts that one of the things on my personality growth To Do list is actually how to complain less. Precisely less and not completely erase it, because, on some occasions

And you shouldn’t either. I am determined to make it into a cult around the feeling, taking life out of you. Cult jokes aside, though. Just stop for a second and think. Not about the regrets you have, but about how much time you potentially waste on the feeling. In my religion, it is one of the top three most wasteful things you can feel and drown yourself in. And you might think, Aya, think about what would have happened if you invested in crypto or whatever. Sure, but I did

I say that often, too. Even though I sometimes dream without precision, because apparently, if you say a few things jokingly, the Universe might as well deliver. The glitch here, or shall I say the fairness of it all, is that you will get exactly that. That’s how last June I found myself on a date with a real 28-year-old virgin who was trying to convert my 10% of my income to his church. But that’s a story for another day. In my line of work, aka working with people, I rarely

I always get what I want. People been calling me out on this loads. A lot of people openly laughed in my face, saying I am cocky, and that is simply not true. The truth number one. Leave immediately if anyone ever tries to limit you. You were never meant to spend time in anyone’s cage (unless it’s your kink, then do right by you). Capitalism is caging enough as it is. So why allow people to put you in a box? Even thinking about it always gives me a micro claustrophobic attack

Buanas dias, everyone! The time my degree in Spanish can come in handy. As a matter of fact, I do have a degree in the Spanish language; however, that personality of mine exists under heavy influence of alcholoc and sadly for many, I am sober at the moment. That time I was living in Madrid for 10 months – I was a local. Still got the accent though. My whole personality of mine for the following week is going to be around the Super Bowl Bad Bunny performance. For obvious reaso

A few weeks back, on yet another rainy day in London, during the first 45 years of January, I was half dressed and packing my moon bag  (literally can fit the moon and 17 outfits) to head to Canary Wharf to style for a photoshoot with one amazing photographer I wanted to work for a while, and a model for a test shoot. Until I opened my message to find that the model was feeling under the weather and had to cancel. If you ever heard about my calendar, you already know that if

Okay, this is happening, nobody panic. Apparently, the whole 14-year-old karmic cycle for me is ending literally tomorrow. 14 years is basically my entire adult life. That’s how long I’ve been single after leaving 3-years old relationship, this is how long I have been truly losing myself and discovering who I am all over again. In that particular order. The time has been had, and gosh, I am ready for this chapter to be closed and write a book on all those experiences or somet

If you are reading this, high standards and ambition look good on you. Just a gentle reminder, if you will. A few weeks back, I was having a catch-up with my bestie of nearly 15 years or so, who now lives in Canada (this information is not important, but this is the most accurate representation of being neurospicy, innit?). And we were discussing what had recently happened in both of our lives, and of course, as the calendar year was about to end, we were talking about 2026 g

Well, well, well! How’s that new version of you doing? Overwhelmed yet? Or all promises start on Monday? You might say I chose violence; I’d like to call it accountability. Goes for you and me, don’t worry about that, my dearest friend. Anyway, Happy New Year (calendar one)! I hope you had your jolly time, and I am here to remind you today that all those goals, promises, resolutions, whatever you call them, don’t have to turn into a burden. If you already know me, you know I

Do you even know what day it is anymore? Well, in case of an emergency, it is Sunday, and this is the last post of the year. What a journey, even though personally my first 7,5 months of the year felt like I was up during the surgery. Nonetheless, I did shed all the old skin I needed in order to reveal my new true self, that, if I am being honest, somehow had lost for the past 14 years of my life, based on literally every single astrology expert on TikTok, and my personal ast

One day or day one? The hardest truth no one teaches you in life (in case you didn't already learnt it on your own) is that most of the time, the only person standing between your current life and you living your dream life is yourself. Some Sunday bitterness, you might think. The truth is, though, well, this is the truth. You might just be your own biggest hater. And this sounds so dumb, don't you agree? With all the doomscrolling out there I've recently completed, we are al

What do you do when you go spiralling? Surprisingly, that was the first time someone ever asked me that question. I thought to myself, and realised that either people get it or they are mediocre and neurotypical and saying “you are too much”. So naturally, I had to explain to the person what it means and, most importantly, how it feels in my brain. Because rebrand, aka upgrade my entire personality and business, is a lot. So let me take you on this journey. I promise, I still

Hybranation season started earlier this week when all my fellow Londoners and myself included saw the snow. In November. That was not on my bingo card. So, this and yet another middle-of-the-night crisis hit me. With winter coming, the only thing we have on our minds is to dress up as warm as possible, at least that’s what I keep hearing (rarely me though, I was built to commit to an outfit I imagined and pull through with it, and no temperature outside will pivot my ultimate

Great people will uplift you; others, with small, narrow-minded views and a lack of ideas, will try to bring you down. They should have taught us that in school. And budgeting, oh how much I wish it were the case, instead of formulas that I have not once used in my life. Maybe that way I would have some financial literacy instead of justifying a lot of my spending with “ I’m just a girl” (thank the Universe for the Gen Z slang). With all the seriousness, I was thinking the ot

Now, who said that doom scrolling on TikTok, during your pitty party day, is bad for you? How else am I supposed to pick myself up? Guessing which ex still loves me and is afraid to tell me (according to my latest taro reading) is a must-go-through ritual that should land on your fyp before, though. That’s like a sign that you are closer to a portal. To a better algorithm out there. Pinky promise. Now the past week has not just wooped my ass yet again, on Friday it has frankl

Listening to Case Kenny’s new book, The Opposite of Settling , he asks the question, “When was the last time you felt most like yourself?” Book of the week – Case Keny, The Opposite of Settling for self-growth and revolution, what you already know. The Rich people’s problems – for fun. I sat there for a moment before heading out for my morning walk in a gloomy London weather, trying to piece together where it was, who I was with, and what I was doing. I couldn’t remember. N

And what do we do when the hope for romantic love leaves us? Correct! We throw ourselves into work. As you can tell, my week was supposed to be a very cute one and include a mini vacation, but instead I had a mini crisis. Though it was not all dramatic, full of tears, and internal screaming. It was a very quiet death of hope. My good friend keeps asking me not to say that, but that is true. That hope has left me. And being a proud lover girl, I need to give my love to someone

Have you had a mini crash out on the internet this week? Well, I have. Not only do I have one, but it was scheduled for me to record The Risky Business Diaries, so I was withholding my tears on camera, I edited it, and posted it online for everyone to see. All because it does feel like I am doing nothing at all. Despite my endless ToDo list, I see no progress. Of course, by progress, I mean financial stability, which my brain needs in order for me to feel "safe". Aren't I sup

October is going to be a month of content. At least that's the plan, and by plan, I mean I am about to trick my brain multiple times into...