You might say I chose violence. I’d like to call it accountability.

Well, well, well! How’s that new version of you doing? Overwhelmed yet? Or all promises start on Monday? You might say I chose violence; I’d like to call it accountability. Goes for you and me, don’t worry about that, my dearest friend.

Anyway, Happy New Year (calendar one)! I hope you had your jolly time, and I am here to remind you today that all those goals, promises, resolutions, whatever you call them, don’t have to turn into a burden.

If you already know me, you know I am a strong believer that we are the ones in charge and we are always one decision away from better choices, habits, and life.

Keep in mind for the next several minutes of this read that I did congratulate you on the new calendar year, since I am a woman and fully obliged by the moon, and other pretty planets, I do belive more in Chinese New Year (17th of February this year around), since this is the day that all the planets are trully in alligment and starting the moememnt with the fire horse. Hence, when the actual year begins. Because let’s face it, with all the Christmas lights gone too soon in January and the brutal winter actually starting, it does feel exhausting for many reasons, but for me personally, after Chinese New Year, I always feel truly uplifted.

Well, that’s amazing, Aya. But what does it have to do with anything?

Glad you raised this concerned question.

I was having a delicious dinner with my friend last night (one of my love languages is loved ones cooking for me). And you know this type of friend, where you actually do live in the same city but meet up every 6 months for a great yap. Even though you promise each other to do this more often, you never seem to be able to. Also makes me happy how everyone is getting out of their holiday hibernation and being social again. But I digress.

We started talking about plans for the year and how ambitious all of our goals were, and how, at first, overwhelmed we both were writing those delusional ideas down. Being all this forward about your dreams is amazing, but when it comes to actually achieving those, this is where shit gets actually overstimulating, and tons of us just give up on whatever those goals were. But listen to me, baby girl.

You have come thus far and broken so many generational traumas as a woman; it is time you break this resolution curse, too. It is both hard and easy at teh sme time, if I am being honest. It all depends on the side you choose to view it from. Let me give you an example and some type of initial guide with examples.

You’ve set all these goals that a big, beautiful, and, some might say, delusional

Now, either break it down to smaller steps yourself, or use AI; no shame in that. That will help you not only break down those huge goals into smaller ones, but also brainstorm (what I use AI probably the most for). Ask your AI to help you break down those goals into smaller subgoals and draft potential steps for you to begin with. Do you see where I am going with this?

Give brief info, something along the lines: I’ve been writing a book for a few years, I am based in London, what would be my next steps if my final goal is to be a published author? It usually gives ideas, and I brainstorm afterwards on what I can actually do, step-by-step, and then do my own research.

And the best part of it all, is that you give yourself grace and use this gap between January (calendar NY) and February (when the year actually starts) to build yourself those little guides for each and every goal you’ve set intentions for. A month nd a half is a very good time to get those ready, and maybe you will be able to even start with some of those mid-January.

Which leads me to my second point of making your dreams come true.

Building a habit. They say it takes 21 days, but I would stick to at least a month.

Just to be safe.

This is your time.

Think of all the habits you want/need to build in order to achieve those goals. To give you an example from my scrapbook, is to have more time to be able to achieve those goals, as I lose focus often, and while I am building my focus habit, I want to have my mindful routine completed first thing in the morning, hence I need to wake up around 5:30 am (I am dead serious), to have my slow mornings, like i like them to be. To be honest with you, 5:30 is so fucking early, especially in the winter, so after negotiating with myself, I came to an agreement on 6 am. For now, to get myself comfortable.

I hope you get the gist. And this way, you’ve yet again got a month and a half to build consistency in your life. If you decided to elevate your style/change your style (I am constantly playing with styles and aesthetics of my own, so that is the time I also look for interesting items that would fit into not only my new aesthetic but my current wardrobe, so they all can coexist with each other. The more styles you like, the more diverse your outfits will be, and the more variations of the outfits you can have.

As a stylist, my wardrobe is actually not that big because I know exactly what I like and what impression I want to give off, styles, and aesthetics I love, and it all works for me. I also saw this beautiful trend on TT, where girlies allow themselves only 12 purchases a year. 1 item per month, and I think it is wonderful, and it makes you very selective of what you actually want and need.

So this is the time for you to go into your closet and make an audit of it all. Winter and summer. It will feel overwhelming, so feel free to book a free intro call with me so that I can help you get through it and draw the next steps for your transformation.

It’s all one decision away. And it is time you make those decisions in your favour. Be selfish, be audacious, be focused. You’ve got this.

And remember, fuck being humble, you deserve every bit of it.

Oh, and before I forget:Book of the week: Lights Out by Navessa Allan (it is a dark romance, but it is beyond hilarious too).

Start your Styling Journey with Hot Mama Bakery Styling Society.

Statement Piece Style Guide is ready for you to download, and it is completely FREE.

To get started with personal style on a little more advanced level, I’ve prepared for you a little something: Ultimate Style Guide, worth £79, is now on flash sale for £2.99.

Hope that helps!

Okay, that’s all.

Love you, bye xo

Your neurospicy fashion stylist,

Aya x