It is not greed though it might be appetite

So what happens in a span of a week once your brain and nervous system feeling at ease? Suddenly, all seems to just flow to you like a waterfall. Magazine putting your styling work on THE COVER of their PRINTED issue, you get invited to style a short film, and receive invitations to LFW (London Fashion Week), last but not least you get kiss on the cheek from the world famous opera singer.

It's been a week since the last day at a job I worked for to cover my bills in London and it trully feels like I enetered some new reality. To the point that a few days earlier I had to sit there on the couch of my living room filled with sun and cry my eyes out because happiness and self pride were just overfloating me. So I sat there and cried with pleasure to simply let my nervous system know that this is our new reality.

It feels like all those great things I've accompliched were standing is a long waiting line and once the wait was over, they barged in all at ones. And I am here for it. Becacuse what do you mean my work is on the cover of the mag? This is unbelievable yet very much belivable because to stay true to myself I am the shit. Fuck being humble. Because at the end of the day it is not greed though it might be appetite.

Grandma always said good appetite means you are strong and healthy. Little did we both know it was never about the food, truly. So right now it feels like I have been starving for nearly a year and I have finally had my lost meals served all at once. Weird analogy, I know.

But what I also have an appetite for is incredible interior designs or weird buildings (preferably brutalistic architecture with softness inside), and incredible designers. Exhibit one. Chiyang Duan. The perfection. I will keep it short and sweet. A must to follow. As I mentioned, the weirder – the better.

This past week also feels like I finally can breathe properly. People told me I also look less miserable, which I choose to take as a compliment. The productivity levels are high (though, not as high towards the end of the week, as I'd hope for, but it's okay).

It is funny that a year ago, I was quitting corporate job thinking I would have to almost never deal with the excel spreadsheet again, yet after sending over 60 emails this week – I did return to spreadsheets. To hell with it though, I love me a good spreadsheet, not going to lie to you. Those email were all towards the people in PR to get the chance to yet again attend London Fashion Week this September.

I was mentioning it at my first ever TikTok LIVE how I do usually my research on brands and their collection to be able to undesrsand whether or not we are compatible. Luckily I do have neurospicy brain that is interested in EVERYTHING.

Then the most iconic moment of the week – the COVER of the MAGAZINE.

Let's all take a moment, please.

Look, little 7yo Aya, this one is for you, my sweet girl.

I'm okay, I'll pretend I wasn't screaming when I got that little text a few weeks back.

Shoutout to the photographer Kyle, who trusted me with styling of his idea. Let's take another moment for the page with mentions. I think I'll frame that one for sure.

There. My name in print.

Someone told me it's not that big of a deal. We are no longer acquaintance. For obvious reasons. Which actually got me thinking how I started viewing my friendships too, when I started making more content and trying to build a business where the word of mouth is important as ever. Got me question a lot of connections that I had.

Also opened my eyes to how many people I've met in a span of one year that showing me their support constantly. Because at the end of the day, it will cost you nothing but kindness. Plus imagine all the FOMO when all of us are on the yacht in Monaco and you are still being stingy with your "precious likes". Oh well.

As one of my favourite philosophers said "Therapy showed me how to open up. It also showed me I don't give a fuck". So if you feel some type of way after reading the above – that's on you babe.

To the people who showed me so much love and support in the past year – I see you, I love you, I appritiate you. Stay tuned, there is so much coming.

Okay, that’s all.

Love you, bye xo

Your slightly chalant fashion stylist,

Aya x